Chicago Pita Chicken Caesar

Margaret: Mmmmmmm. Delicious. Remember before about my "processed" taste complaint? Well, Chicago Pita has done what no other place has been able to do so far. Put actual, HUGE, chunks of real chicken on their salad. It was really good too. Really well flavored, and it definitely felt like I was eating something. Because I was, I was eating huge, REAL chunks of yummy chicken. I think there could have been a little more yummy stuff on it, but all in all, this was a pretty good salad. A-

John: One look at ACTUAL CHICKEN and I knew I was going to be OK. What I love about Chicago Pita is that almost everything is from scratch. The way a restaurant should be. Once you become a regular they remember you. The way a restaurant should be. This was a meal of a salad and everything worked out even (not too much or too little of any ingredient) in the end. Only gripe is I would have loved some hard boiled egg or maybe red onion. A-

Quizno's Chicken Caesar

Margaret: Meh...it was okay. I like this salad well enough I suppose. I ate more of this salad than I have a lot of the other ones. I just can't get past the processedness of a lot of these salads. I thought the cheese tasted kinda funny. And the way they diced their chicken was smart, because it was so small, you never got a full bite of processedness. There were a nice amount of onions and tomatoes. The pita was good, and you all know me, I made little cesaer chicken pita salad sandwiches, and when I mashed them all together like that, it was pretty good. Now, I tried to find the actual nutrional information for the salad and apparently, Quizno's doesn't list their info. Which is annoying. But if you're stuck on an island with a Quizno's and a Great Steak and Potato Company, get the Quizno's. Fo shizzle. Oooh, and for some reason the triangle shape of the packaging really pleased me. B-

John: Quizno's you just might get back into my heart. You were a rotten client and when I tasted your "pre-release" version of this salad last fall I thought it was gross. Well you've turned it around. They have given up their own flatbread and switched to pitas. Good move. For $6 I got real chicken and real shaved parm and a big cup of peppery caesar dressing. Between the cheese, the dressing and the pitas I'm sure there must be some calories (934) but I'll take 'em. B+. Would have gotten an A- but I'm still pissed about all that overtime Quiznos made me work last summer.

Great Steak and Potato Comapany Wrap Up

John: As a rule "Never eat at a restaurant with blue in its logo." Its not a natural food color (blueberries are purple) and should warn you off. The grades say it all. Nasty and glad its gone. Count yourself among the lucky if you've never been there.

Margaret: Not Comment - they weren't salads to begin with.

Starbucks Harvest Salad

John: Romaine, cranberries, walnuts, gorgonzola, carrots and apples with a pretty light bal. vin for $5. I liked it well enough. I don't think the dressing was good/large enough to tie the ingredients together. From the first bite this was a B salad. No real raves - no real complaints. Starbucks does a good job of having "cafe feeling" food in its little case so if you are maybe looking for something quick and cheap and low in calories this will get you there. B.

Margaret: Now, see this salad is where things get a little screwy. Because, I thought this salad was horrible. Gorgonzola cheese tastes like smelly b.o., I've already mentioned my aversion to cranberries in my salad, and whole chunks of apple with a vinagrette dressing just doesn't go for me. So even though I didn't necessarily enjoy this salad, it wasn't the salad's fault! Everything was fresh, the apples were crispy, there were walnuts and carrots and it wasn't very expensive. So...the salad to me was unappetizing, but the salad for others might be delicious. So, in the name of trying to keep things balanced, I'll give this one a C+. They call me Middle of the Road Hixx.

Ding Dong the Wretch is Dead!

John: You dream about things like this - and then they happen. I almost believe in THE SECRET. Great Steak Company & Potato has closed its doors. Why? Who can say. Maybe there aren't enough teenage boys in the world to keep it open. The best part is never having to eat the damn HOT HAM SALAD!!!!

Margaret: Some days, you wake up, and everything is the same as it was two days ago. You're back at the same old job, doing the same old thing, and life seems like its just going to repeat itself over and over and over. UNTIL, something wonderful happens. Something so wonderful it can change your whole day, something that finally puts a smile on your face you didn't expect to see on a soon-to-be rainy Monday. Some days, life can change on a dime. One whole crappy food place opens, and one, oh so thankfully closes. Goodbye Great Steak and Potato Company, and don't let the ass salad hit you on your way out.

Great Steak and Potato Company Turkey Salad

John: This $4.99 salad exceeded my expectations in every way. I thought is would be gross. It was fucking disgusting. I dread the next time this joint comes up. As a matter of fact I'm starting to dread most of the upcoming salads. Does anybody like hot meat on a salad? Really - please leave a comment if you do - cause I can't figure out for the life of me why these things are even available. The $15.00 I spent on lunch covered in french dressing would have tasted better. F.

UPDATE: I just threw up at my desk. Not a ton. But really how much puke is too little puke to mention?

Margaret: Eating this salad was a lot like eating elephant poop. With hot meat on it. And then like someone pooped on it again, just for good measure. Tonight I'm going to buy myself an ipod shuffle, and I REALLY didn't feel like getting food poisoning, so in all honesty, I really didn't touch my ass salad. I did take one bite of the turkey and it was like eating greasy, flat ass. At least the other Great Steak salad had "okay" steak on it. This turkey was truly disgusting. I saw a hot carrot and had a tiny bite of hot cucumber, and then I just wept into my ass salad, wept like a lost child at the carnival. I'm just going to stop writing now, because there is nothing I can say that adequately portrays how truly disgusting this salad was. This salad gets and F-, if there is such a thing. Blech. Patooey. Yuck.

McDonald's Grilled Chicken Bacon Ranch

John: YUK! One solid week of 18+ hour days at work on a pitch and this is my reward? Another hot meat on lettuce in a bowl nightmare. I finished eating it out of obligation and extreme hunger. What kind of salad is that? McDonald's - thanks for making the switch to romaine over iceburg. Thats cool and so are you. But this salad was designed as some sort broad demographically pleasing average salad. And average salads get average grades. C-. The minus is for the LACK of a packet of factory bread croutons.

Margaret: I'm with my boyfriend on this one. And you know what? I was looking forward to this salad, because the southwest salad was muy deliciouso. This salad? Tasted like warm cicada on wilty lettuce. I believe there were bacon bits on the salad, but I didn't taste them. There were definitely some carrots, shaved so thin you couldn't taste those either. The grilled chicken was a strange salmony color, which is great for salmon, but not chicken. Patooey. A hot salad on a hot day does not a cool Hixx make. Blechy. This was a gross salad Mickey D's...maybe that's your nickname because thats what your salad grade is...a big fat D.